Okay, so let me clear on this. I am not a big fan of the new Who series. There's a lot of reasons, but I don't want to keep you here all night and we should get to what the article is actually about.
Some problems I had...
1. Fanfic self-insertion characters. Tell me if this sounds familiar... "I want to be a Doctor Who companion, but I'll be pretty, tough and indepedent, but have a troubled personal life. The Doctor will rescue me from that life and take me on lots of awesome adventures, because he's secretly in love with me. And he'll be young, and cute in a dorky kind of way. Then when we're in real danger, I'll summon magical powers and solve everything. Teeheehee." It should if you've seen even one episode of new Who. There will always be a companion like that. Heaven forbid the show be... I dunno... ABOUT THE DOCTOR?
2. Speaking of which- Why does the Doctor always have to be super tormented and lonely all the damn time? He's always one step away from breaking down into a blubbering cry baby.
3. The solution at the end of the episode is usually a magical button.
4. Especially during the Russel T. Davies era, you'd usually have fifteen minutes of ultra-melodrama awkwardly shoved in there.
5. With Moffat, he's only got one idea. It's the "overgrown child in a man's body." Both of his Doctors where that way. His version of the Master (when he's not capering around like a monkey) is like that. It's not just Who either. He shat out a version of Jekyll and Hyde where Hyde is just a child inside.
I kept watching the show off and on, because between the disappointments there were occasional good ideas or episodes. Usually enough to keep it from going into complete dreck.
I was interested when I saw hype for the new Who. Finally, and old guy and not someone who's bona fide adorkable. No love subplot for once? Okay, gooood. The new series will be darker and more like the original series? Sounds good on paper, but already I see problems. One of my brothers wanted to see the premier episode in the theater. I said, "What the hell," and gave it a shot.
I would have been better off watching it on the TV. You can do more interesting or useful things while the TV is on, whereas your only respite in a movie theater is to take a dump. Which is what this premier did on my face.
Let me break down the problems.
1. "Darker and more like the original series."- First of all, this was not any darker than their usual plot line. Second, assuming that making it darker would make it more like the original series just shows you don't know much about the original series. The original could get pretty damn silly, sometimes even on purpose.
2. Regeneration blues- Yes, it's established lore that the Doctor acts a little loopy when he regenerates. However, it's also well established that wasting a lot of time on that can derail the plot and confuse the audience. I've got no real sense of what this new Doctor was like. I've already read things by people saying "This how I interpret his character!" but from what I've seen that's like reading tea leaves. He spends most of the episode bumbling around in alleyways, mumbling and being a hobo. Next time someone bitches about Troughton being a space hobo I'll direct them here, where we see our beloved Doctor buying a smelly jacket with a watch. I got almost no sense of what his character is like! Except for maybe, addled old man.
3. The trio- I forget what they're called. The lesbian lizard woman, maid and the Sontaran butler. What a miserable, wrecked, unfunny trio. They're what Moffat busts out when he doesn't want to write Doctor Who. Why the hell are they in this episode? It needed to be about the NEW DOCTOR. It needed to blow through the regeneration and tell a story about him so we get to know his character. Not these assholes, who get at least a third of the episode trying to prove how awesome and funny they are. FUCK. YOU.
4. The new companion relationship- They aren't in love any more! Yay! Now she's his baby sitter! Wait? What? Is he going to keep up this bumbling old man schtick? And she's going to be his nursemaid? I think we can call it a down grade.
5. The new opening credits- Don't give a shit. Story and character is what matters to me.
6. It's the same old shit- Here's the thing. This ultimately doesn't feel any different from any of the stuff we've been spoon fed since new Who began. Heck, I'll give Moffat some cred in that he normally integrates the maudlin moments into the plot better than Davies. However, this episode felt like a step backward. You had huge, obvious maudlin moments shoved in where ever. This is the same old shit.
So yeah. I won't be watching the "new" Who. I've seen it already.